Over a year ago, I was facing one of the hardest challenges in my life. I was in love with someone of 6 years and our lifestyles didn’t sync anymore. I was on the fast track while growing out of my skin and my love was content with our routine back home. I thought he was ‘the one’ – because he was a person that I shared all my deepest secrets with; lived in different places together and graduated from the same university (which is where we met). I was holding on to something that I knew would never change.. the arguments escalated, support was never there and I couldn’t bare to be unhappy for the rest of my life or hold him back from what he wanted. I’ve never cried so much – it was a painful feeling in my gut and my heart. All of the time that we both invested was officially over… if you’ve ever been here.. you know the amount of pressure and stress it took to finally say Im done.. and no longer hold on.
Where should I run too?
I began searching online for a place that I could travel far, far away. I needed to clear my mind..live fast, die young and do everything that I want to do. It was time to go on a journey where I could start completely over.
I found a travel group that was going to Bali, Indonesia — East Asia would be a first for me. The more that I researched Bali, I knew this was the place to where I could focus on myself. I didn’t know much about the group travel but I was ready to take a risk because I needed change, badly.
So… my boyfriend and I separated.. it was painful but I couldnt stand waking up every day wondering what the fuck I was doing with my life. I was stressing so much about his happiness and never putting my priorities first… this was my time to show myself that I still had the hustle in me. I’d rather be lonely than be with someone that wasn’t right for me.
Two weeks later, I bounced on three airplanes to land in beautiful Indonesia. Everything was happening so quickly. I’ve never traveled this far away from USA – I didn’t know what expect; no idea who these people were, how I was going to get around, if this group travel was a scam and how would I keep up with my social media agency. Well.. I made it happen — didn’t I?
I wake up every day wondering if I did the right thing
My friends and family remind me that I had the perfect boyfriend.. at the time, he was the right guy. I really cared for him — and because of this breakup; I will always have trust issues and to this day – I still havent dated or even tried to find relationships. I love being a single woman because I’m given the chance to focus on myself and what I want in life.. my happily ever after.
How am I doing in Bali?
Well, I feel in love… almost immediately. My first trip in 2016 was planned for 2 weeks, but I extended for a month. You can buy a VISA on arrival for 30 days for $35.00. Boom… I was caught up.
This is my third trip back to Bali – and I’ve officially built my life in this incredible country. Indonesia stole my heart. I still have roots back in Detroit, Michigan but will be breaking those ties when I return in December for Christmas. I dont want to look back and wonder if I made the right decision… I want to figure it out as I go.. because that’s how I live my life to the fullest – spontaneous.
Has my life changed since last year?
Absolutely, I have no doubt that I am a different person than I was a year ago. I’ve traveled more than 30 countries; built an empire and created a tribe of loyal friends and family members who support my decisions. The best part… I’m healthy & happy. I don’t have any let-downs because I won’t let people get to me. I decided that the best way to live is to only worry about my happiness. If others around me want to bring their bad energy, so be it.. but I will let it go in one ear and out the other. I have enough weight on my shoulders with my own problems that if I continue to let others affect me — I will drown. I am holding on day by day.
What do I have planned for the future?
Not sure, but I will continue running 100MPH until my heart stops… All I can say, from experience — if you are ever feeling stuck in a situation — especially in a relationship or just life is sucking.. maybe it’s time for a new journey. This journey will be your biggest challenge but your best life lesson.. you may not know where to stay, how to get around, who will help you, how you will make end’s meet.. but those moments of fear will open opportunities for growth & change in your world. Growth is a fundamental of becoming a better person. I will sometimes miss my home & routine but I am happy with caos and craziness because there’s something new happening all the time.
I am constantly putting my life in God’s hands. I owe my life to the angels that keep me safe every day. You have to trust that everything will be ok and not think so much.
If I can make it — halfway around the world with no plans.. you can do it too. Take a leap of faith and let things happen, you never know what might surprise you.